Hispanic Fanatic

Recently, I attended the Hispanicize business conference, where I networked with smart people, snagged some free food, and hung out (however briefly) with Edward James Olmos.

I realize, however, that my post about the conference may not have given you the full flavor of the event. In the interest of rectifying that situation (and because it makes for a pretty easy post to write), here are some of the more interesting tidbits, observations, and general oddities that I heard at the conference.

There are ten of them, but there could easily be more.

“Telenovelas are a cultural touchstone for us. I’m sorry, but it’s true.”

“On the Census form, there shouldn’t be a box to check for race. There should be a color wheel, and it goes from cotton to cinnamon to black, and everything in between. And you just mark your skin color.”

“When we polled people about the top characteristic of Latino culture, ‘emphasis on family’ was number one. Nothing else was even close.”

“I tell my clients who are immigrants, ‘You’re in America now. If somebody rips you off, you say those magic American words: ‘I’m calling lawyers on your ass.’ That’s when they know they’re assimilated.”

“Whether it’s English or Spanish, language is just a tactic. It’s a means to identify a group, but it’s not an identity in and of itself.”

“Univision is now ranked among the top four networks. Isn’t that wild? I think it’s ahead of ABC.”

“Too many Latina moms approach the public schools as if they were holy temples, and they give in to whatever the principal or the teacher says. So no fresh ideas ever get exchanged.”

“That sign is supposed to read Mami Bloggers. Not Miami Bloggers. Damn.”

“Acculturation originally meant a reciprocal process, with cultures influencing each other. But now it just means ‘Give up your culture when you get here.’ It’s become a one-way street.”

“Dude, I say, ‘Let the people just be the people.’ Entiendes?”

I’ve been to a lot of business conferences. But up to last week, I had only gone as a grunt — one of those guys who represent the sponsoring company and whose job it is to hook up the PowerPoint demonstrations, tear down the rooms, and occasionally, tell the speakers what to say (yup, I’ve written a few presentations for zero credit).

So it was great to finally go to a full-fledged, hobnobbing, networking-frenzy, whip-out-those-business-cards kind of conference where I was an actual attendee.

The event was Hispanicize 2011, which may sound like a sci-fi feature about cyborg Latinos, but is actually the “premier marketing event devoted to … brand marketers, bloggers, non profits, and marketing agencies focused on Hispanic public relations and social media.”

Basically, if you write about, or market to, or spend a lot of time thinking about Latinos, you would be a fool to skip this conference. So for three days, I hit the convention floor, went to breakout sessions, and networked with my fellow Hispanics and the people who love us.

It resembled many other business conferences, in that there were plenty of people in suits, and talk about monetizing this or that, and decent swag for the taking. But few other conferences have this much hugging. Really, you can’t get hundreds of Latinos together and expect everyone to stick to handshakes. Damn it, we like to hug, professional attire or not.

This was especially true when I met those individuals who had, to this point, only existed to me as online presences, or email buddies, or frequent commenters. There is no term for the discombobulating sensation of speaking face to face with people you have gotten to know through their writing, or via their comments. It is, of course, a brand-new emotion fit for the twenty-first century, and eventually, we’ll come up with a phrase to cover it.

In any case, my main reaction was to become a bit overwhelmed at the brilliance on display. My natural cynicism couldn’t dismiss some of the great ideas I heard. And my self-confidence (or is it arrogance?) took a backseat when I talked with some of the people who are leading the Hispanic community out of the dark ages.

The last major event was a keynote speech by Edward James Olmos. The Oscar-nominated actor gave an intense, freewheeling, intellectually challenging talk that covered his belief that there is only one race (that would be the “human race”). It also referenced the Mexican drug war, the documentary Inside Job, the value of the Swiss franc, and the fact that Harvard scientists have reversed aging in mice…Really, it all added up somehow.

I met Olmos after his speech and talked to him for approximately 9.7 seconds before a Battlestar Galactica fan interrupted me. But it was ok.

I gave him my card.

Congratulations to Jules, who won the latest Hispanic Fanatic contest. She won copies of Raul Ramos y Sanchez’s latest novel, House Divided, as well as his earlier book, America Libre.

And all Jules had to do was comment on one of my many long-winded posts. What a deal…

Thanks to everybody who entered. We had a much better turnout to this contest than to the initial giveaway. This implies either that most of you are high-falutin’ literary types, or you just really don’t care for Nicolas Cage that much.

But now that we’re on a roll — two contests in one month — maybe I’ll throw another giveaway in there soon.

Until then, stay tuned for more rants.

And by the way, now you can catch some of my posts on the Being Latino site.

Click here to check out some of the other writers for this great project.

OK, so Season of the Witch is apparently not a runaway blockbuster. That doesn’t mean I’ve soured on giving out freebies to you, as thanks for reading my posts.

As such, I’m happy to announce a new contest. And this one is much more Latino-relevant.

The gifted writer Raul Ramos y Sanchez has a new novel coming out. It’s called House Divided, and it’s an epic about a Latino family.

Readers who comment on any my posts will be entered for a chance to win a copy of both House Divided and his earlier novel, America Libre.

Raul Ramos y Sanchez is an amazing writer and, I’m pleased to report, an occasional commentator on my posts. So I’m thrilled to promote his work and get more people to read him.

And as opposed to my last giveaway, this contest is open to everyone, not just lucky individuals in select cities. I don’t even have to like your comment; just post a response to any of my articles, and you’re entered in the drawing.

I will announce the winner of both books during the week of January 24. So let’s get those comments going, and good luck.

Thanks to everybody who entered the contest for Season of the Witch passes.  I’m happy to announce that the winner, chosen more or less at random, is Corinna. She will attend a special screening of the film here in LA and, hopefully, report back to us if it sucks or not.

I will resume my regularly scheduled rants with the New Year. And I hope you will continue to read and comment and rage and laugh with me into 2011.

See you soon.

Usually, at this time of the year, I take a short break from my ranting and raving to celebrate the holidays. That’s when I just post something to the blog such as, I don’t know, a video of a dog on a trampoline or the like.

Well, this year my holiday hiatus is different. Taking a cue from my fellow bloggers (most of whom are better marketers than I am), I’m running my first contest on this site.

Here’s how it works:

Readers who comment on this post (not any of the previous posts) will be entered for the chance to get passes for the Nicolas Cage movie Season of the Witch, which comes out next month.

You may ask, “What does Nicolas Cage have to do with Latino issues?” It’s a fair question, but I would point out that a dog on a trampoline has little to do with immigration reform, so let’s not overthink this one. It’s just a fun contest.

In any case, I will choose a winner at random from the commentators on this post. If we get a lot of responses, I may choose more than one, so increase your odds by commenting early and often.

The winner(s) will receive two passes to see the movie on January 6, 2011, in one of the following cities:

Los Angeles

San Jose

Chicago

Houston

Miami

Phoenix

If you win and attend the movie in Phoenix, I’m going to go ahead and assume that you oppose SB 1070.

So what should your comment be about? Well, that’s the beauty of the contest. Say anything you want.

Tell me that I’m brilliant. Tell me that I’m a moron. Inform me that all Latinos are extraterrestrials bent on world domination.

Or better yet, get into the spirit of the thing. Tell us if you believe in witchcraft. Pass along that creepy ghost story, or share if you’ve had a supernatural experience. Or you can just discuss your favorite Nicolas Cage film (mine is Adaptation).

The only thing you have to include in your comment is the city in which you intend to see the movie, so I can plan accordingly.

Now let’s get those comments flying, people. I want to give away these passes, and I can only do that if I get responses.

If you win, I’ll email the passes to you. By the way, I’m the only one who will see your email addresses (unless you specifically want to share it in the body of your comment), so don’t worry about that.

I’ll check back over Christmas to see how we’re doing, and I will pick a winner by New Year’s Day.

Until then, have a happy Festivus.

I want to thank Pipil, Ankhesen, Macon D, Cooper, Godheval, and AZHispanic for their recent comments on my posts. I hope that they will continue to read my articles as this site morphs once again.

You see, I’ve started contributing to Change.Org, an online hub for social issues and political topics. You can read my first post for them here.

So in the future, some of my posts will link to their site. Don’t worry, you won’t be inconvenienced beyond one click of your mouse. And the good news is that I will be updating the blog more frequently.

And since we’re on the subject of social change, here’s an update on one of the latest issues to bedevil Hispanics: the U.S Census. Actress Rosario Dawson and her non-profit group, Voto Latino, are mobilizing Latinos to fill out their census forms. Clearly, Dawson is more than just a pretty face.

You’ll have to trust me when I say that I had a witty and urbane post scheduled for today’s update. But I’m deviating from my usual set-in-stone, overly planned life to write a quick update on yet another devastating earthquake to hit Latin America. If you haven’t heard already, a monstrous 8.8 temblor nailed Chile early this morning.

This quake was hundreds of times more powerful than the one that devastated Haiti just a few weeks ago. Upwards of two hundred people are feared dead, and parts of the country are in ruins. This shift in tectonic plates was centered not far from the biggest earthquake ever recorded, a 9.5 horror that struck in 1960.

As you know, the focus of this blog is on Hispanic culture in the United States. However, when something this major happens in Latin America, it can’t help but affect Hispanics here. Indeed, I’m sure many Latinos with family in Chile are going to have very long days ahead of them.

And if I really want to push the American angle, it has crossed my mind that my new home state of California may be due for some major earthshaking soon. It seems to be a trend. In that case, many American Latinos, including yours truly, may be woken up in the middle of the night by a most unsettling feeling.

I’ve been through one significant earthquake, a 6.1 when I first lived in LA years ago. It’s not as fun as you might think. However, that tremor pales in comparison to what just hit Chile.

The country is  going to need some serious assistance. Once again, if you can help, please do.

First, let me thank Louis for his comment on my post “Business Time.” Also, I’m pleased that Nellie found my post “Mazel Tov” to be relevant to her efforts to raise JewRican children. Check out her comment on that post; it’s most cool.

Next, I have to remind you that I occasionally take a break from posting new articles when something pressing comes up, be it a vacation or a move across country or an attack by Martians. None of those things are happening at the moment, but there’s still going to be a short gap between posts. I figure it will be a week, tops, so don’t abandon me for all those other cynical Latino bloggers you have bookmarked.

The reason for the brief hiatus is a combination of personal demands (I’ll be away from the computer for a few days) and the effort required to make improvements to this site. With hope, those improvements will be implemented soon, and they may surprise and delight you, or they could repulse and terrify you (by the way, that’s what we call a “teaser”).

To keep you entertained in the meantime, here is a video of my favorite breed of dog (a boxer) going crazy on a trampoline. Enjoy, and be sure to check back, because new updates will be coming soon.

I’ve written often about the difficulties of pinpointing exactly who is Latino and who is not. You’ll remember some of the familiar arguments (eg, Costa Ricans are Hispanic, Spaniards are not, Mexicans are Hispanic… unless they’re Chicanos who reject the label… wait…). In sum, it’s a messy process with no clear delineations.

In my most recent post, I mentioned that Sammy Sosa is Latino. Sosa is from the Dominican Republic, which is the only nation that shares a border with Haiti, one of several countries in the Caribbean that are not considered Hispanic.

When one thinks about it, this is rather arbitrary. Perhaps it is because Haiti has a French, rather than Spanish, cultural tradition. Or maybe there’s a racial element there.

In any case, the country’s non-Hispanic status was irrelevant to the cataclysmic earthquake that killed an estimated 100,000 people this week. Even before the disaster, the nation was the poorest in the Western Hemisphere. At this point, Haiti is so desperately miserable that one wonders if it would just be easier and more humane to ship the survivors to other countries and abandon that part of the island.

You don’t need me to urge you to donate to relief efforts. You will if you can or want to. Here are links to a few sites where you can make donations. Let’s hope that someday the country – indeed, no country – is so synonymous with human suffering.