Hispanic Fanatic

Americans are huge. Like really big.

We all know this. In places like my home state of Wisconsin, it seems like more people are obese than not.

But we also know that help is on the way. For example, the wonder drug Ozempic has shown amazing results in helping people lose weight. 

And that’s not all it can do. Some studies imply that Ozempic can curb addictive cravings and behaviors. 

Wow, that is some pharmaceutical breakthrough. It just goes to show you how American ingenuity and hard work can…

What’s that? Ozempic isn’t an American drug?

Nope, it is made in Denmark, and it is having such a massive impact worldwide that it is reshaping that country’s economy.

Now, I have no interest in peddling Ozempic. I just find it interesting that this astonishing drug didn’t come from America.

After all, we constantly hear that the reason Americans pay so much for prescriptions is because drug companies need that money to fund their research and development. In fact, Americans spend more on prescription drugs per capita than citizens in any other country.

So all that cash must be funding some life-changing meds, right? Actually, research has shown that there is “no relationship between what pharmaceutical companies spend on R&D and what they charge for new medicines.” The record profits aren’t going to the development of new drugs. They are going to the executives and the companies’ bottom lines.

And Big Pharma isn’t just rifling through American wallets. It’s also raiding the US Treasury. 

Last year, the eight biggest drug companies paid just above 2% in US taxes on a combined $110 billion in profits. Hey, Pfizer even got a tax credit.

So with all that cash, why didn’t any American drug companies invent Ozempic? This medicine wasn’t developed in our uber-capitalist free market (which is really just a rigged economic model for big corporations, with nothing “free” about it).

This drug came from semi-socialist Scandinavia, the supposed failed states of the North Atlantic that conservatives hate.

It’s almost like giving enormous corporations boatloads of money doesn’t benefit the average citizen.

But don’t worry. I’m sure the next time you desperately need medication, the heavily subsidized pharmaceutical companies of America will hand it over to you for cheap. 

And if you believe that, you must be taking some serious drugs.

Most of the people in my family are fairly cheerful people. My mom, in particular, is the most upbeat and optimistic person I’ve ever met.

It’s a little odd, in that nobody in my family is a millionaire, and we’ve all had our fair share of traumas. And yet, here we are, apparently happier than your average stressed-out American.

And a recent study found that Latin America is arguably the happiest place on Earth. Yes, even with all the region’s socioeconomic problems, residents of Latin America don’t sweat the small stuff.

Why is this?

Well, I’ve written before about the Latino tendency to be positive, even in the face of grim news and dreary statistics. But I recently came across a scientific theory for this relentless smiling.

Now, it’s old news that research “suggests an association between mental wellbeing and a mutation of the gene that influences the reuptake of serotonin, which is believed to be linked to human mood.”

Basically, much of our happiness, or lack thereof, may be traced to our genetic makeup.

Scientists have found that the Scandinavian population is most likely to have this gene. This may be one reason why Denmark, Finland, and other counties in that region perennially rank as the happiest nations on Earth.

Of course, a progressive government that ensures a high standard of living for their citizens may have something to do with that perpetual singsong attitude. But let’s not dwell on that because it’s, you know, socialism.

In any case, additional research has found that like the Scandinavians, Latin Americans are “more likely to contain a specific allele involved in sensory pleasure and pain reduction.”

As such, Latin Americas and Scandinavians are more likely to be chipper than, say, the Chinese or the Iraqis (of course, there are very real non-genetic reasons for their respective unhappiness too).

Is it possible, then, that as more Hispanics intermarry and intermingle and inter-you-know-what, they will spread their happiness genes among more and more Americans?

Hey, there’s only one way to find out.