Hispanic Fanatic

Because I so often write about the dark side of human nature, I thought I’d pass along some good news in America’s fight against racism. It seems that at the University of Alabama, “multiple African American women have accepted bids to join traditionally white sororities. The move ends the last bastion of segregation at the tradition-bound southern university.”

Now, I’ve never understood why anybody would want to be a sorority girl or a frat boy, but that’s not the point. Surely, we can be happy that another pillar of institutionalized racism has been toppled. And I presume that Latina girls are now eligible to wear Greek-lettered sweatshirts in Alabama.

Well, I should have stopped reading the news article there, because in the internet comments section of the story (always a disturbing barometer of what Americans are really thinking), I did not encounter the cheers and upbeat replies that I expected to see.

Instead, I saw a lot of apologists for bigotry. There were the people who said it wasn’t a racial issue, and that the sororities just have high standards, such as the woman who wrote, “I’m as lily-white as they come and had the same chance of getting into a UofA sorority as a black girl.” Well, actually, she had a much better chance, as evidenced by the fact that, according to the article, current “members of the traditionally white sororities said they were pressured by alumnae to keep black women from joining.” Well, if that is not overt discrimination, I don’t know what is.

But many people (and not just that lily-white girl) must have skipped over that line, because I also learned from readers’ comments that the University of Alabama Greek system was not prejudiced. Rather, it was just “the media and everybody else wanting to play the race card,” and those pesky minorities themselves, who keep “cramming [diversity] down our throats [and] keep the pot boiling and that is raging all over the country now.”

There were also the readers who insisted that letting blacks into a formally all-white sorority was a “politically correct situation,” and that minorities should “stop acting like the world owes it to you to be fair.”

And then there were the philosophical bigots, such as the gentleman who insisted that “if we want to reserve the right to not serve or admit a black person, or anyone else for that matter, we should be allowed that freedom.”

But my favorite was the straightforward racist, such as the guy who cracked that the white girls had better “keep an eye on their valuables!”

And at least one commentator saw grim overtones in the concept of black sorority girls, labeling the news as “more White genocide, cheered on by the mainstream media.”

Yes, this was the reaction that this unequivocally positive news story generated. I feel much better about America right now.

Don’t you?

We don’t do may plugs here at Hispanic Fanatic world headquarters. But this weekend is the third annual Grand Marian Procession, Mass, and Fiesta honoring Our Lady of the Angels (Nuestra Señora de Los Àngeles). The parade takes place on September 14 in the heart of Los Angeles.

The sponsoring organization is doing pro-bono work to raise awareness for Latinos and to help Hispanics take pride in their roots.

Well, that all sounds pretty good. So if you’d like to attend, check out this. 

The first time I ever walked up to a Las Vegas gambling table, I hit blackjack on the initial cards dealt to me and won $50. I knew immediately that it was all downhill from there.

I broke even that weekend in Vegas, but I haven’t been back much since then. However, perhaps it’s time that I made the road trip, because after all, casinos are trying “to create a more Hispanic-friendly environment” and bring in more Latinos.

Why is this? Well, no doubt the brick-and-mortar casinos are feeling the heat from online gaming sites like castlejackpot.com (which is, by the way, linked all over the web). They are tired of having customers stay home, perched in front of their laptops, when they could be in the casino, perched in front of slot machines.

But this is about more than traditional outlets fighting upstart internet rivals. It’s about the continuing quest of American businesses to tap into that fastest-growing demographic: the Latino.

After decades of being ignored, Hispanics are the new hot consumers, exemplified by the fact that “Hispanic buying power is worth $1 trillion now and is expected to grow another 50 percent to $1.5 trillion in the next five years.”

In addition, “Hispanics have the greatest purchasing power of any US ethnic group and taken together will soon represent the world’s ninth largest economy.”

And as I recently pointed out, upscale Latinos are poised to become “The most influential segment since the baby boomers,” when it comes to “lifestyle, financial…behavior, and purchasing habits.”

Basically, America has more Hispanics than ever before, and they have more money than ever before. And casinos, which are well-known for separating people from their money, see the potential.

So that’s why you will see “Hispanic-themed slot machine games and more Spanish-speaking card dealers.”

I’ll admit that I’m a bit mystified about what a Hispanic-themed slot machine would look like. But I’m guessing that lining up three spinning chupacabras hits the jackpot.

As I’ve mentioned before, I recently became a father. My wife and I were having one of those most natural of conversations, which was discussing what kind of person our son will grow up to be.

Somehow, we got into a “those kids today” rant about how cushy the Millennials have it. After all, my wife and I are Gen X, so we didn’t have the internet, iPods, and bike helmets. We didn’t have parents chauffeuring us around to special events geared just for our age group, nor did we have culturally enriching programs that told us how special we were. And of course, there was never the option of living with mom and dad indefinitely.

Yes, after talking about our childhoods, my wife and I were feeling pretty good about our toughness and resiliency. Look how cool we are!

Then we remembered our parents.

My mother grew up in a third-world Latin American country where she literally walked miles barefoot to school each day. Then she came to America, where she knew nobody and barely spoke the language. As for my wife’s father, he was a child during the Great Depression, and he went to sleep hungry most nights.

Yeah, that shut us up pretty damn quickly.

In this great melting pot we call America, people of every race commingle and socialize routinely. Why, you can’t walk down the street without elbowing groups of hotties representing both genders and every ethnicity, all hanging out and being so very cosmopolitan and twenty-first century.

Wait, that’s not real life. That’s a Gap ad.

In actuality, a recent study has found that about “40 percent of whites and 25 percent of non-whites do not have any close friends of other races.”

This means that large segments of American society still view other races as an exotic other. Specifically, the survey found that older, white, conservative women were the least likely to hang with someone who didn’t resemble them, while “younger Americans were more likely to say they have friends — or romances — outside their own racial group.” Also people on the West Coast “had the most diverse relationships while people in the South had the least.”

Yes, even in this mythical post-racial environment, a lot of us prefer to kick back with our own kind, if you get my racially coded drift.

But wait, the poll also found that “Hispanics were the most likely to have a diverse friendship network.” So once again, it’s Latinos who are on the cutting edge of culture.

Apparently, we will drink with anybody.

Blame it on the amygdala.

This region of the brain, which plays a central role in processing fear and aggression, may be the source of one of the most insidious concepts to bedevil humankind: racism.

A recent study revealed that people’s amygdalas react differently when they see individuals who do not share their race. Furthermore, the “same circuits in the brain that allow us to see which ethnic group a person belongs to overlap with others that drive emotional decisions.”

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I’ve written before about the asphyxiating grasp that rich people have on the American Dream. As we know, the concept of social mobility is, at best, a faded myth that may never be relevant again. At worst, it is delusional pabulum served up to the masses to prevent them from revolting.

But just in case you thought you could get ahead by sheer hard work and a can-do attitude, consider the following fact: According to one study, your degree of social mobility depends to a large degree upon where you live.

So for those of you who are poor in, say, Georgia, the odds are pretty good that your children are not going to swing the middle-class lifestyle. But don’t worry, “the chances that affluent children grow up to be affluent are broadly similar across metropolitan areas.” So again, the rich are going to be ok.

But wait — isn’t education the great equalizer? Well, nabbing a college degree is indeed one of the best ways to increase your income. Unfortunately, many kids are being priced out by tuitions that can only be called obscene. Again, however, you don’t have to fret over the wealthy. Because “college students have a better chance of getting financial aid if they come from affluent backgrounds than if they are lower on the income scale.” Yes, once again, the wealthy get a break denied to others, even if — as in this case — they don’t need it nearly as much as people on the lower end of the socioeconomic scale.

Of course, Hispanic kids are less likely to be rich in the first place. And thanks to backward cultural priorities, the odds are good that their children and grandchildren won’t be financially secure either.

Well, at least it won’t be awkward at Thanksgiving dinner, because we won’t have to endure about those rich relatives flaunting their wealth. Because everybody will be broke.

By now you’ve heard GOP Rep. Steve King (a longtime friend of the Hispanic community) insist that “among young undocumented immigrants in the United States, ‘for everyone who’s a valedictorian, there’s another 100 out there who’” are essentially drug mules.

King, “an Iowa conservative who has come under fire for comments about immigrants before,” has stood by his remarks, insisting that he has “seen it with my eyes and watched the data and video that support what I say.”

I think we would all like to see the video that shows 100 Latino drug mules ganging up on one Hispanic valedictorian. That would indeed be persuasive to the immigration debate.

But all these references to mules have me thinking about another anti-immigration zealot who was obsessed with animals. I’m taking about Cordelia Scaife May, an heiress who, “before her death in 2005, devoted much of her wealth to … curbing immigration, both legal and illegal.”

Scaife May “never knew poverty,” unlike so many of the immigrants she despised. Ultimately, she became a crazy recluse and alcoholic. She also was obsessed with birds.

Her millions continue to fund right-wing anti-immigrant groups to this day. So here we have a rich person who never worked a day in her life. She was a virulent xenophobe and racist who held her fellow humans in contempt simply because they were born in another country. But she had a soft spot for the little birdies.

And who can argue with those priorities?

Basically, some conservatives don’t think of Hispanics as animals. They think of Hispanics as less than animals.

Decades after James Brown first exhorted his brethren to say it loud (“I’m black and I’m proud), another group of oppressed Americans — gay people — adopted the idea and found resounding success in proclaiming their pride.

But African Americans, gays, and (presumably) gay African Americans are not the only people who are proud of their culture.

Latinos are well-known for bursting with pride for their heritage. However, while such expressions of ethnic boosterism are practically required on Puerto Rican Day, or during Hispanic Heritage Month, or — Lord help us — Cinco de Mayo, such statements often come across as just empty phrases.

After all, do we have good reason to be proud?

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As you can imagine, I am always looking for ways to insert more sex into this website. But how can I do it while still focusing on racial and ethnic issues?

Fortunately, porn star Alexis Texas has presented me with an opportunity.

Recently, Ms. Texas (and I am sure that is her real name) announced that she would not have sex with any black men in her movies. Considering that her profession calls for her to have, shall we say, rather relaxed standards about what she will and will not do sexually, this comes as a surprise.

After all, she is basically saying that she will do all kinds of crazy shit, and allow people to watch it, but there’s no way she’s touching an African American.

It doesn’t get much more racist. This is especially perplexing because — and here the topic returns to Hispanic culture — the woman is part Puerto Rican. No, you really can’t tell from her blonde hair and fair skin. But as we all know, Hispanics can be of any race.

Now, I’d like to give Alexis Texas the benefit of the doubt. Of course, it is not just because of my well-documented obsession with voluptuous blondes, which she is. It’s just that… sorry, I lost my train of thought after the phrase “voluptuous blondes.”

Anyway, it seems silly to call for a boycott of Texas’ films, as I imagine that would have little impact on her fan base.

So why do I bring this sordid story up? Because, as I said in the lead paragraph, it was an opportunity to mention sex while still talking about race. Throw in the fact that I got to use the phrase “voluptuous blondes” three times, and this may have been my best post ever.