Hispanic Fanatic

I didn’t always take breaks for the holidays. In past years, you would find me posting furious missives whether it was the week of Thanksgiving, Christmas Day, or the anniversary of the first pickleball court opening up. All are national holidays.

However, fatigue has set in as I contemplate each fresh outrage and witness the slow destruction of the country’s foundations, ethics, and standing in the world. I’m not giving up, but damn it, I just want a little time to eat pumpkin pie and drink a big old glass of wine in peace.

There will be plenty of time to assess the latest travesty, which will inevitably both follow and precede more cataclysms.

What will happen next? Will Trump give Alaska to Putin? Will the GOP ban all books written above a third-grade level? Will Ted Nugent be named Secretary of Agriculture? Each of these is a distinct possibility.

So I’m taking the rest of this week off. I will see you next week, when the country is hopefully still intact.

Thanks

I’m going to take a rare week off from saving the world one blog post at a time in order to enjoy this Thanksgiving holiday with my family.

So there’s no new article this week. Certainly, I’m not going to say anything about the ongoing shit-show that is the impeachment process… nope, almost got me going there, didn’t you?

Anyway, be sure to take some time this week to give thanks that we live in a country with so much prosperity… even though the richest 1% are currently hording so many resources that it boggles the goddamn mind. I mean, seriously, people! What’s it gonna take to… wait… pull back… not gonna rant. Just gonna give thanks.

As I was saying, we can all be grateful that our country’s leaders are calm, rational people who value facts and expertise over conspiratorial nonsense and never engage in cult-like behavior that…

OK, skip that. It’s a damn lie.

Deep breath.

Let’s settle on this: Happy Thanksgiving.

Yes.

See you next week.

Yes, it is indeed challenging in Year One of the Orange Despot to find anything to be grateful for.

Normally, at this time of the year, we would offer thanks for what we have and all the positive developments that are happening for us as a nation.

However, the consensus among sane Americans is that, this year, we should instead give gratitude for the things we don’t have and the horrible acts that have not occurred.

For example, we don’t have a war with North Korea, or a collapsed economy, or a rescinded First Amendment, or a total absence of healthcare for all except the super-rich — at least not yet.

So let’s all shout, “hallelujah” over these amazing gifts.

But there is one group of Americans who are truly grateful this holiday season. Now, I’m not talking about the mega-wealthy one percenters, or the plutocrats who are devouring our country. Although they’re doing great, those bastards are never grateful for anything, because their whole lives are relentless, insatiable quests for more, more, more.

No, I’m referring to the Trump true believers. I’m talking about those fabled white working-class voters who love Trump and live in places like rural Pennsylvania — you know, the people who decided the election and overwhelmed your vote.

Politico recently ran an article profiling the president’s most fanatical supporters. The article found that for these voters, their “satisfaction with Trump now seems untethered to the things they once said mattered to them the most.”

In other words, last year, these people said they were voting for Trump because he would bring back the coal industry, end the opioid epidemic, build that fucking wall, etcetera.

Almost a year later, Trump hasn’t accomplished any of those things, or even tried particularly hard to do so. And yet, his fans don’t hold it against him. Indeed, “it’s not that the people who made Trump president have generously moved the goalposts for him. It’s that they have eliminated the goalposts altogether.”

Yes, for these voters, it doesn’t matter that we have a bumbling man-child dragging the country into massive discord. He is their guy, and he shares their rage and hatred and ignorance and incoherence. So damn it, they’re sticking with him.

And how does one reason with such superhuman levels of denial and delusion?

Well, it’s simple really. Don’t even try.

You see, the hardcore “Trump supporter is living in a state of downplayed disappointment — like a child taking a bite of black licorice thinking it was chocolate, feeling regret, then accepting the candy anyway.”

I mean, these are people who trust Trump more than they trust Jesus Christ.

Regardless of your religious beliefs, that should tell you something — a whole lot of somethings, actually.

So this Thanksgiving, if you’re stuck sitting next to die-hard Trump supporters, realize that there is quite literally nothing you can say to them to get them to change their mind about the guy.

As such, just skip the chitchat and double up on pumpkin pie. Trust me, dinner will be far more enjoyable that way.

I’ve written before about the asphyxiating grasp that rich people have on the American Dream. As we know, the concept of social mobility is, at best, a faded myth that may never be relevant again. At worst, it is delusional pabulum served up to the masses to prevent them from revolting.

But just in case you thought you could get ahead by sheer hard work and a can-do attitude, consider the following fact: According to one study, your degree of social mobility depends to a large degree upon where you live.

So for those of you who are poor in, say, Georgia, the odds are pretty good that your children are not going to swing the middle-class lifestyle. But don’t worry, “the chances that affluent children grow up to be affluent are broadly similar across metropolitan areas.” So again, the rich are going to be ok.

But wait — isn’t education the great equalizer? Well, nabbing a college degree is indeed one of the best ways to increase your income. Unfortunately, many kids are being priced out by tuitions that can only be called obscene. Again, however, you don’t have to fret over the wealthy. Because “college students have a better chance of getting financial aid if they come from affluent backgrounds than if they are lower on the income scale.” Yes, once again, the wealthy get a break denied to others, even if — as in this case — they don’t need it nearly as much as people on the lower end of the socioeconomic scale.

Of course, Hispanic kids are less likely to be rich in the first place. And thanks to backward cultural priorities, the odds are good that their children and grandchildren won’t be financially secure either.

Well, at least it won’t be awkward at Thanksgiving dinner, because we won’t have to endure about those rich relatives flaunting their wealth. Because everybody will be broke.